Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Stardom Awaits

You may have noted a lack of entries is this Journal or Log. I have of course been pursuing my banking business and, as always, have several Schemes for my Further Enrichment percolating at various tempos, leaving little time for these missives.

As you no doubt recall, at the recommendation of my nephew Dick Dastardly, I was investigating the opportunity to return to my First Profession, acting, via the medium of the American Moving Pictures industry. After sending my Loyal Servant Homer off to New Jersey, negotiations were entered into which resulted in an agreement to appear in a film.

Wish me luck, loyal readers. As time avails, i will update here with a log of my experiences.

Never bring dialectic to a Rhetoric fight

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Thursday, July 28, 2016

One just can't get quality work done anymore

A close personal friend and co-worker has gone into politics. The printer seems to have faied him in the printing of his business cards, however.

Sunday, May 8, 2016

American Politics (again)

I have been asked on recent occasion my thoughts on the American Presidential Race. I generally try to avoid politics of all sorts, nothing good has ever come from it. Even more, I refrain from comment on affaires Americaines. It is their country, and if Americans want to alternatively bless it or ruin it, it is certainly little business of mine.

Green roots

I received a pleasant visit from a  friend who runs one of those advanced calculating systems. He shared this with me. He tells me it is very funny, a parody on fellow workers who demand unmerited authority. I don't quite get the technology, but we all know the arrogant striver who wants more authority than he has demonstrated he can handle.

Jessep: You want access?
Kaffee: I think I'm entitled to it.
Jessep: You want access?
Kaffee: I want root!
Jessep: You can't handle root! 
Son, we live in a world that has policies. And those policies have to be guarded by men with root. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for access and you curse the Admins. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that your inability to do what you want, while tragic, probably prevented a crash. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves systems...You don't want root. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me restricting you. You need me to restrict you.
We use words like availability, performance, service level...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline. 
I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very system stability I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you put your ass on the line and stand a shift on-call, explaining to 10,000 users why the system is down. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!

Monday, January 18, 2016

American politics

Few realize that, although I am a Proud Citizen of the Great White North, I was born and spent my earliest years in the United States. I was born in an inn in Southern New Jersey and spent my first two school years on the Island of Manhattan.

Which gives me some license I think, to comment on Matters American. And while I do not follow the politics of the Southern Colossus, I must say that the American Presidential Candidate Ted Cruz bears an amazing resemblance to a Gentleman of my acquaintance. I refer of course to the famous nightclub entertainer and raconteur Johnny Fiama.

See for yourself.

Friday, January 15, 2016

Dear Uncle Snidely

Dear Uncle Snidely
I have a serious problem. I can't seem to impress or inspire the affection of any of the young ladies I meet. My life is rapidly become a lonely struggle against despair. I see that you never seem to lack for feminine company. Please teach me how can I win with the ladies.
Ladyless Loser

Thursday, January 14, 2016

A Visit From Family

I had an unexpected visit from my Nephew Richard yesterday. For those who do not know him, Dick is quite active in the racing business. He was on a long-form race Over The Pole in one of those amazing Zeppelin craft one sees in the Newsreels. It's remarkable what can be done these days. Unfortunately, one of his Unscrupulous Competitors nobbled his Noble Craft, bringing it down almost in my backyard in Alberta. When I told him he was free to Drop In anytime he was in the neighborhood, I did not expect to be taken so literally! Fortunately he avoided Serious Injury.

Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Sense and Suffragettes

There has been much talk lately, not merely here in Canada, where any Silly Idea can gain currency, but even in that Bastion of Sense, England, of allowing women to vote. It is perhaps superfluous to enumerate the reasons such a move would be Folly, but it is a Fact Proven by Extensive Experience that one cannot rest on the expectation that the Common Man will see such things with Reason and clarity.

The Reason advanced for so-called "Female Suffrage" is that Women deserve to have a Voice in the Decisions made which affect them as much as they affect Men. To which I can only reply "Balderdash!" The purpose of a government is to protect the Peace, Prosperity, and Comity of the Nation, not to give a voice to all. And frankly, women's voices are annoying.